The simple but sound jon boat design finished the Lake Norman course in 1:15, clear of second place Ship Happens by a whopping 30 seconds. Cardboard Cowboys—entered by Shannon Bermes—completed the course in record time.

After winning the race in the final heat, Cardboard Cowboys returned to the start line to start anew, and nearly lapped the other final heat participants before opting to help push the struggling Quackers—entered by Brittany O’Neil and crewed by a team of ducks—to the finish line.

The Titanic Award for best sinking ship was a tight contest but ultimately went to the Goonies—entered by Scott Wallace—which sank in ceremonious fashion as one of the boys in the crew turned toward the beach and, with the heart of a true captain, saluted the crowd as he went down with his ship in waist-deep water.

Race conditions were cloudy with seven knot southwesterly winds, which made for challenging but manageable conditions for the eight of the 12 boats that finished the race.

Second place, with a time of 1:45, was Ship Happens—entered by Steve Clarke—whose theme was inspired by, er, the bathroom. Its design centered around a giant toilet including a bowl, tank and handle. A roll of toilet paper was affixed to the bow and managed to stay dry during its maiden, and presumably lone, voyage.

The News Leak crew in front of their waterlogged ship

Third place, with a time of 1:59, was The News Leak, which raced under a partnership between Cornelius Today and the Hough STEM Club. Anthony Iota, Vincent Hancock, Barry Kaplan and Nash Beshears—all juniors at Hough—raced a hull built on cardboard carpet tubes after many, many unsuccessful prototypes proved unseaworthy during testing.

The crew huddled after the race to take stock and make preparations for their return next year, which will include an analysis of rowing styles.

“Barry’s handle kept hitting me in the face, so that wasn’t good,” said Beshears.

Best Decorated was won by Natchez—entered by Amber Strunk—that was inspired by the Mississippi River steamboat of the same name. It featured a highly intricate design that her family workshopped while traveling home from a trip to New Orleans. Natchez led the race early after an inspiring sprint to the finish line in the opening heat.

The People’s Choice award was won by Cryptid Cruiser—entered by David Judge—which resembled the mythical lake creature Normie. Alas, it was far less seaworthy than its namesake and sank before its heat began.

Sharken’s pirate abandons his ship

Races are never without controversy, and on this day the crowd was mixed on the recipient of the Titanic Award. Many felt the vessel Sharken—entered by Gina McGowan—was left out to dry, er, equally deserved recognition.

Its crew, which included a sword-wielding pirate, repeatedly tried in vain to right their listing ship once the fourth heat began. Despite a valiant effort, which included an attempt to paddle an upside-down ship, Sharken succumbed to the lake depths as the pirate brandished his sword and returned to land.

The second annual race was held at Jetton Park this year. Attendance was estimated around 350 participants and spectators. Many watched from the shore and in boats anchored in the cove.

“From pirate ships, to toilet frigates and lake creature vessels, there was a nautical convoy of boats and brave sailors navigating the chilly waters of Lake Norman,” said Troy Fitzsimmons, director of the Cornelius Parks and Recreations Department.

“This has the potential to develop into a signature event for our town.”